Category: Major League Baseball

No More Time to Make the Doughnuts and Land-o-Links for 12/6/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big East, Big Ten, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, College Basketball, College Football, DePaul Blue Demons, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, Music, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, SportsLeave a comment

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New Yorkers better grab those Krispy Kremes quickly, as you’ll see when you take a look at today’s links:

(1) New York Bans Most Trans Fats in Restaurants (New York Times) – Horrifically, Chicago also has plans to ban all food that tastes good.

(2) Rex Grossman – Freakin’ Exhausting (Ron Karkovice Fan Club) – The following is my personal letter to Rex posted on my fantasy football league message board as I released him for (gulp) Jeff Garcia:

“Dear Rex,

You have broken me. I can’t take it anymore. Not only do you make me rack my brain while watching the Bears, my favorite team, but you’ve also tanked my fantasy team when I needed you most in the wake of Donovan McNabb’s season-ending injury. One can only take such a double emotional beating on a weekly basis. Therefore, I have to painfully say goodbye.”

(3) Fight Was Right, Even If The Result Wasn’t (Mark Tupper Weblog) – The undermanned Illini didn’t look too bad against my sleeper national championship pick of Arizona on Saturday, but there’s still a whole lot of work to do. After a relatively tough week, Illinois gets to come back to the Assembly Hall to play against one of the great pronounciations of an acronym in IUPUI.

(4) Sox’s Talks Center on Rays’ Baldelli (Chicago Tribune) – One thing for White Sox GM Kenny Williams to think about: Rocco Baldelli invariably breaks a limb within three weeks of every Opening Day. He’s the Italian baseball version of Grant Hill.

(5) On Notice: Fiasco Edition (mgoblog) – Pure Michigan anger (and it’s all justifiable).

(6) Perhaps She Has Chosen The Wrong Extracurricular Activity (Deadspin) – Well, Michigan will have at least one person cheering for them at the Rose Bowl. USC cheerleaders, bless their hearts, are so accomodating.

(7) The Perfect Storm (Siberian Baseball) – LaTroy Hawkins in Coors Field. Mull that thought over for a moment.

(8) Wham, Bam, Thank You, Sam (Chicago Sun-Times) – Sammy Mejia and my law school alma mater of DePaul proudly defended the honor of my undergraduate alma mater on Saturday by beating up Bill Self in his first return to the state of Illinois since leaving the Illini twisting in the wind.

(9) Great Games Make It Harder To Blog Since There’s Nothing To Bitch About (Blog-a-Bull) – Have the Bulls finally turned a corner in the wake of the Ben Wallace headband madness?

And finally…

(10) Rock Group Nice Peter Explains Song ’50 Cent is a Pussy’ (AllHipHop.com) – Over/under on the number of days before the members of Nice Peter are found buried underneath the Meadowlands: 2.

Land-o-Links – 11/29/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, College Basketball, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, Random Thoughts, TelevisionLeave a comment

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I’ll eventually get back to writing some full-fledged substantive posts once I have some time, but you’ll at least see a return of Frank the Tank’s Classic Music Video of the Week tomorrow. Until then, enjoy these links:

(1) Does Cubs’ New Star Have a Message from the Tribune? (New York Times) – With daily speculation about the Tribune Company breaking up its media conglomeration, a lot of people seem to believe that the recent spending spree by the Cubs is an indicator that the corporation wants to sell off the team since the club has had a reputation of being tightwads relative to its wealth. However, as Andrew Ross Sorkin (no relation to the TV producer Aaron, who I’ll be addressing separately on a completely different subject below) notes, this is completely counterintuitive in the business world and, specifically, the private equity world that the Tribune is probably heading into, where cutting expenses is paramount. If anything, the increased spending by the Cubs makes it less likely that the Tribune is going to part ways with the franchise (at least in terms of selling it off by itself without coupling it with other assets). My feeling is that while the newspaper operations of the Tribune, which are the source of the earnings pressure, will be split off in some fashion, the synergy of the Cubs, WGN Television, WGN Radio, and the partial stake in Comcast SportsNet Chicago is too lucrative and valuable as a whole to break apart into separate pieces.

(2) Critic Loses Giddiness for NBC’s Show ‘Studio 60’ (Chicago Tribune) – This article encapsulates my love-hate relationship with Aaron Sorkin. When “The West Wing” and “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip” have been focused on the insider baseball workings of the respective subjects of politics and the entertainment industry, they have been among the most well-written and fascinating pieces of dramatic television anywhere. However, it seems as though Sorkin just can’t resist the opportunity to hammer the viewers over the head with his personal political views, which regardless of whether one agrees with him, are delivered in such a heavy-handed and preachy manner that he destroys the quality of his shows. Case in point is the example that Maureen Ryan refers to in her article, where Sorkin intimated in a recent “Studio 60” episode that there are people who can live for 50 or more years in that supposed “backwater town” of Columbus, Ohio (despite the fact that it is home to the largest university in the United States, the state capital of the 7th largest state in the country, and a burgeoning “creative class”, the city’s mere location in the Midwest clearly indicates to Sorkin that its population must be full of rubes) and never hear of Laurel and Hardy. (Note: This could very well be the only time that I will ever defend anything from Ohio on this blog, but it’s deserved on this point.) I’ve gone over before how much I oppose the social conservative agenda, yet comments such as these continue to give credence to the charges that Hollywood is full of liberal elites.

(3) Guard Play Awful; Work To Be Done (Mark Tupper Weblog) – Two years ago, the embarrassment of riches in the Illini backcourt with current NBA-ballers Deron Williams (who’s playing incredibly well this season for the Jazz so far), Luther Head, and Dee Brown catapulted the team to the national championship game. Now, it appears as if though Illinois is going to be shuffling around guards until Demetri McCamey arrives in Champaign next season. Granted, I knew there would be a number of painful evenings with the departures of Dee and James Augustine this year, but being able to watch the new team last night for the first time made me realize that we have a huge deficit in terms of being able to produce on the offensive end of the floor. It’s going to be even tougher this weekend on the road in Phoenix against an Arizona team that I believe can go the distance.

(4) Miracle Drug (Ron Karkovice Fan Club) – The Bulls’ back-to-back games against the Knicks couldn’t have come soon enough with all of the Ben Wallace headband wackiness. Once again, I give thanks to Isiah Thomas, the greatest GM in Bulls history.

(5) Crede Tale All About Cash and Dash (Chicago Tribune) – If the White Sox want to move its pillar at third base in Joe Crede as part of blockbuster package to bail Alex Rodriguez out of New York, that’s one thing. However, Crede for Chone Figgins isn’t going to make my heart flutter.

(6) Bears Road to the Playoffs (Windy City Gridiron) – As the Chicago media has commenced the inevitable frothing at the mouth to yank Rex Grossman for Brian Griese, the larger picture is that the Bears are still in command to secure homefield advantage throughout the playoffs. On a related note, notwithstanding the excellent play so far of Eastern Illinois alum and Jessica Simpson boy-toy Tony Romo (let’s not forget that Rex got off to a similarly hot start this year before NFL teams got enough video of him to pick him apart), my feeling is that the Cowboys are paper tigers on a hot streak that they cannot maintain and aren’t a long-term threat. The one real NFC challenger in my eyes is Seattle with a healthy tandem of Matt Hasselback and Shaun Alexander back in the fold. I don’t want a Seahawks version of last season when the Bears destroyed the Panthers during the regular season only to get subsequently smoked by Steve Smith at Soldier Field in the postseason.

And finally…

(7) Snoop Dogg Arrested, Again (Washington Post) – I thought it was standard operating procedure to carry your piece onto the Tonight Show.

(Image from Fall TV Preview)

Thankful For This Wacky Week and Land-o-Links for 11/22/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago Bulls, Chicago Cubs, College Basketball, College Football, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, Random Thoughts, Sports4 Comments

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It’s been a wacky week leading up to Turkey Day, with Rupert Murdoch and Fox, of all people, coming to their collective senses for once by deciding that a special and corresponding book where O.J. Simpson goes through a “hypothetical” rendering of how he would have killed Nicole Brown-Simpson and Ronald Goldman is a bad idea, Michael Richards of Cosmo Kramer fame spewing out the N-word on stage over the past weekend and then gets laughed at in the middle of his apology on David Letterman, the Cubs organization opening up its wallet to sign Alfonso Soriano until he’s eligible for Social Security, the Jets attempting an onside kick at the opening of the 2nd half that didn’t work against the Bears, Northwestern attempting an onside kick at the opening of the 2nd half that worked perfectly against Illinois, an Ohio State-Michigan rematch for the national championship being a distinct possibility after a classic game on Saturday (although USC needs to lose one of its last two games, forcing the Wolverines to switch gears and having to cheer for Notre Dame this weekend), and Suri Cruise no longer has parents out of wedlock. Despite of all that, there are still plenty of links out there for your Thanksgiving weekend:

(1) Steve Milton: The Rubber Industry’s New Best Friend (Chicagoist) – At some point in my lifetime, the Guiness Book of World Records went from being a collection of outstanding human achievements such as getting to the top of Mount Everest the fastest or the having the longest long jump in international competition to morph into a freak show that honors the carnie that can cram the most piercings into his belly button. That being said, this rubber band ball is pretty sweet.

(2) Macy’s Brands the Holidays (Wall Street Journal) – The only thing that could be worse than the feeling that I had walking by the old Marshall Field’s on State Street the other day to see a bunch of red Macy’s banners all over the place is the thought of someone putting a huge spaceship in the middle of Soldier Field. Oh wait…

(3) Q and A with Will Carroll (Siberian Baseball) – Minneapolis Red Sox had a great session on the gyroball with a contributor to Baseball Prospectus.

(4) White Sox Top 10 Prospects (South Side Sox) – Speaking of baseball, here’s a summary of the top 10 prospects in the White Sox farm system.

(5) Time To Bring On Tougher Challenges (Mark Tupper Weblog) – The schedule has been pretty easy for Illini basketball so far, but it’s going to kick into high gear with games against Maryland and Arizona last week. Rich McBride looked sharp last night coming off of his suspension for impersonating a Portland Trailblazer.

(6) You’re Beautiful (Linda) – My talented sister had a show at the MFA Gallery at Montclair State (I’m not sure which exit that is in Jersey) this week. In case you were wondering, I received absolutely NONE of the artist genes that run in the family.

(7) Don’t Blame Me If You Freeze Your Ass (Chronically Insane) – Tips from Chronically Insane to keep warm during this holiday season.

(8) Bowing Down to the Golden Calf (Fleece the Pig, Flog the Pony) – Another year, another disasterous Circus Trip for the Bulls. I will never understand why Jerry Reinsdorf and Bill Wirtz don’t use their pull to get Ringling Bros. to come to the United Center during the summer when the building is empty as opposed to the very beginning of both the basketball and hockey seasons.

(9) Bush’s Daughter Robbed in Argentina (Washington Post) – A theft that’s pulled off right in front of a bunch of Secret Service agents? Now that’s something that truly deserves an entry into the Guiness Book of World Records.

Go Bears, Go Illini, Go Bulls, and Happy Thanksgiving!

(UPDATE: For even more entertainment, via a Deadspin tip, Gilbert Arenas has his own blog now and it’s highly recommended reading.)

(Image from New York Times)

The Windy City vs. The Big Apple: Examining The Rivalries

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago Blackhawks, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, NHL Hockey, Sports1 Comment

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While Chicagoans hold their greatest vitriol for the Packers, we can take solace in the fact that no matter how the Bears perform, we at least get to live in what we consider to be the greatest city in the world as opposed to Green Bay. As I’ve noted before, Chicago has across-the-board pro and college sports rivalries with all of the teams in Detroit, but anyone that’s ever lived in the Windy City would never willingly move to the Motor City. (Granted, any that’s ever lived anywhere would probably not willingly move to Detroit.) There’s really only one town that Chicago is constantly comparing itself to in terms of life in general: New York City. Chicago has always competed with New York in terms of sports, pizza (as a certified pizza connoisseur, I have a deep respect for the thin slice that you can fold over, but there’s nothing that compares to the deep dish), the arts, comedians, writers, mobsters, politicians, financial markets, skyscrapers, rappers, and pretty much everything else.

Since New York holds an unparalleled place in the world’s psyche along with carrying a whole lot more sizzle, though, Chicago has a bit of an inferiority complex with its East Coast rival as displayed in the “Second City” moniker, albeit the harping about New York here is not nearly as acute as the afflictions in Boston and Philadelphia (I’ve seen firsthand how neurotic those people are towards NYC). In the age of geographic alignments of sports leagues and divisions, Chicago-New York matchups don’t take on the gravity or frequency today as they did compared to even only a decade ago, yet there’s still some glamour associated when the two largest sports fan markets in nation meet up on the field, court, or ice. (Don’t waste my time, L.A. “fans”.) Thus, in honor of the Bears’ being in the midst of two consecutive trips to the final resting place of Jimmy Hoffa, here’s a ranking of the Chicago-New York sports rivalries from top to bottom:

(1) Chicago Bulls vs. New York Knicks – Obviously, the first thing that comes to mind are the heated battles in the early-1990s between Michael Jordan’s Bulls and the Pat Riley-led Knicks, who were essentially the Bad Boy Pistons minus basketball skills other than hard fouls. While the Bulls got the best of the Knicks more times than not with several dispositions in the playoffs and Jordan’s “Double Nickel” game at Madison Sqaure Garden from his 1995 comeback (years ago, the late Gene Siskel wrote this nice retrospective on #23’s top performances at MSG) , I’ll still go to my grave believing that the MJ-less Bulls of 1994 would have made it to the NBA Finals that year if not for the egregious phantom foul call by Hue Hollins on Scottie Pippen in Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals. (Only the 2000 Illinois-Michigan football game could compare in terms of me being violated by an officiating crew – Illini fans know what I’m talking about.) Outside of just those ’90s games, these two NBA franchises are amazingly intertwined in terms of players and coaches with Phil Jackson, Charles Oakley, Bill Cartwright, Jalen Rose, Eddy Curry, Jamal Crawford, Antonio Davis’ crazy wife, and, of course, John Starks (at the time of that signing, Jerry Reinsdorf obviously felt that he didn’t piss off Chicago fans enough by bringing Albert Belle into town) just off of the top of my head. Plus, Isiah Thomas was nice enough to give us the draft pick that turned into Tyrus Thomas along with the chance to grab Greg Oden next year in what could turn out to be the NBA version of the Herschel Walker trade between the Cowboys and Vikings. This rivalry is certainly in a down period with Zeke’s historic ineptitude, but I’m sure that it will rise again in the near future.

(2) Chicago Cubs vs. New York Mets – This was one of the top rivalries in the National League before the divisions were realigned following Major League Baseball’s expansion in the 1990s. The Wrigley Field Bleacher Bums were among the most frequent users of the “Dar-ryl” chant against Darryl Strawberry while the most infamous Cubs moment this side of Steve Bartman was the black cat running in front of Ron Santo at Shea Stadium in 1969, which subsequently led to Chicago’s historic collapse to give the Mets the pennant. In fact, when the Cubs challenged a proposed realignment during the 1980s that would have sent them and the Cardinals to the NL West when there were still only two divisions, the Tribune Company cited the team’s rivalry with the Mets as the main factor. (The fact that West Coast road games would start at 9:30 Central Time on WGN was only a minor consideration, right?) While the two teams have suffered a number of of poor seasons over the past decade, the eventual three-division realignment is what really took a lot of the steam out of this rivalry. Still, there seems to be a bit of mutual disdain between the two clubs and fan bases that isn’t quite there with my White Sox and the Yankees (as I’ll explain later).

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(3) Chicago Bears vs. New York Giants – A classic old-time NFL matchup that, in my opinion, the league ought to be scheduling every year the way they currently have the Colts-Patriots annual tilt or the 49ers-Cowboys games from the past. Seeing that these are marquee teams with national fan bases from the two largest media markets in the NFL, it’s a no-brainer on paper. There’s a substantial amount of history between these two franchises, particularly in the pre-Super Bowl days when the clubs met six separate times for the NFL Championship (which is still the most any two teams have met in the title game including Super Bowls). Of course, the most memorable Bears-Giants moment from my lifetime, however, was the infamous whiffed punt by Sean Lendetta in the 1985 NFC Divisional Playoff Game (if anyone has found footage of this on YouTube, please let me know) that the Bears returned for a touchdown en route to 21-0 shutout.

(A couple of notes on this past Sunday’s Bears-Giants game: (a) Rex Grossman has certainly been on and off, but I don’t believe that it compares to the schizophrenic play of Devin Hester. The Bears punt returner seriously either fumbles/muffs/runs backwards for a loss or takes it all the way back to the house – there’s seriously no in between. I was cursing his performance all game, which he thereupon ran back a missed field goal for that tied for the longest play in NFL history, which is amazingly held by another Bear in Nathan Vasher. Hester’s like the Kirsten Dunst of football; and (b) The way that Eli Manning was shell-shocked to the point where he threw an interception right back to Bears in the series after that Hester touchdown, thereby sealing the game, cannot be much of a comfort to Giants fans. Rex was on the ascent by the end of the third quarter after playing a horrible first half while Eli got progressively worse as the night went on.)

(4) Chicago White Sox vs. New York Yankees – I always like to compare the Yankees with the Michigan Wolverines in terms of rivalries since, just as everyone in the Big Ten considers Michigan to be a huge rival, all of the American League teams circle the New York games on their respective schedules. However, Michigan really only considers Ohio State, Notre Dame, and Michigan State to be rivalry matchups, while the Yankees limit their emotions to the Red Sox and Mets. The point here is that White Sox fans (and I am most definitely one of them) might put a great deal of importance on the games with the Yankees, but I know well enough that this feeling certainly isn’t reciprocated. This was certainly different in the 1950s and 1960s when the Sox and Yankees were perennially battling each other for the AL pennant (with the Sox on the short end every time with the exception of 1959), yet in this age where the two teams rarely play more than six games per year due to the unbalanced scheduling in baseball, it’s unlikely this matchup is going to be much of a rivalry again unless they start meeting in the postseason on a regular basis.

(5) Chicago Blackhawks vs. New York Rangers – I’ll freely admit that I know little past the basics of hockey, but, as I’ve mentioned before in my Modest Proposal to Save the NHL, I do have to take issue with the fact that the NHL has essentially ignored its “Original Six” rivalries ever since they stopped using those wacky names for conferences and divisions. Thus, in the infinite wisdom of league schedulers, the Blackhawks and Rangers played each other only once last year and will play against one another only one time this season. Instead, Hawks fans get to enjoy plenty of tilts with the Columbus Blue Jackets (at least when they aren’t being blacked out on television in Chicago). So, this once great matchup sadly barely registers anywhere anymore.

And finally…

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(6) Chicago Cubs vs. New York Yankees – This isn’t a rivalry at all other than being baseball fans’ (if not everyone’s) universal benchmarks for failure and success and a Fox executive’s wet dream of a postseason matchup, but it’s an opportunity to remind Cubs fans that Babe Ruth’s alleged called shot came at Wrigley Field against the Chicago National League Ball Club in the 1932 World Series. Ahhh… it’s great to be a White Sox fan.

(Images from SportsWall, Cubbies Baseball, Baseball Myths)

Land-o-Links – 10/27/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, Politics, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

The long Bears bye week is finally over. Until Sunday’s game, there’s a smorgasbord of links to start your weekend off right, so let’s get to it:

1) The Marques Colston Travesty (Manning Family Reunion) – I make no apologies for noticing this glitch after Week 1 and immediately picking up Colston for my Yahoo fantasy football team to exploit it. You snooze, you lose.

2) We Have Ways Of Making Your Mascot Talk (Deadspin) – A warning for all of my family members that attended or are attending Penn: this video is a bit disturbing.

3) “The Running of the Brides” (Linda) – My sister was caught on TV this past weekend (it’s one her friends that’s the future bride).

4) Portland Trail Blazers Get Hint After Being Left Off 2006-07 NBA Schedule (The Onion) – Last year, I saw a bunch of Trail Blazers walk into the Las Vegas casino I was staying in at the time. Let’s just say that it was like Grand Theft Auto, only in real life with really tall guys.

5) Slabs Are Joining Scoops in Ice Cream Retailing (New York Times) – Cold Stone Creamery rules.

6) Tom Skilling Gets Out of Jury Duty (Chicagoist) – His brother knows a thing or two about criminal courtrooms.

7) Fire Jay Mariotti (Petition Spot) – Sign me up.

8) That’s Where The Money Is (Free Darko) – Here’s a big reason why I’m excited for the upcoming Bulls season that’s starting on Halloween night.

9) Ray-Ban Hopes to Party Like It’s 1983 By Relaunching Its Wayfarer Shades (Wall Street Journal) – Remember when this fashion trend was cemented by this commentary on the University of Illinois by our favorite Scientologist?

10) Harold Ford Jr. On His Playboy Party (YouTube) – Even by today’s lowlife standards, the Tennessee Senate race has been particularly ugly. Fortunately, Harold Ford Jr. perfectly summed up his reasons for attending a Playboy Party at the Super Bowl last year. Amen, brother!

11) The Cubs Might Kill This Man (Siberian Baseball) – Take it from someone that’s a White Sox fan: hiring Lou Piniella as manager was the right move for the Cubs. I know that there was a sentiment out there to bring in hometown hero Joe Girardi, but savvy baseball fans know that you don’t get much better than Piniella at the helm. The franchise has been putzing around since 1908, so the least that it could have done for its tortured fan base was get the top manager on the market, which it certainly did here.

12) Outside of Michigan and Missouri, Series Taking Hits (MLive.com) – Mike and Mike had some ominous words this morning stating that the game of baseball is in real trouble if the only time people tune into the playoffs are when the Yankees, Red Sox, Cubs, or Dodgers are involved. For what it’s worth, I’m trying to figure out exactly what deal Tony LaRussa made with the devil to give the Cardinals a 3-1 lead over the Tigers in the World Series heading into tonight.

And speaking of the World Series…

13) Indelible Soxtober Snapshots (Chicago Tribune) – One year ago yesterday, I was basking in the glow of the first White Sox World Series Championship since 1917 in the comfort of my home with my wife. What made that Sox season magical was that, unlike the ’85 Bears, the Bulls dynasty of the ’90s, or the ’05 Illinois Final Four run, it truly came out of the blue: I had no expectations for the team whatsoever at the beginning of last year. In fact, I was pretty convinced that I would never see the White Sox win it all in my lifetime. Fortunately, the magic of Ozzie Guillen’s signaling for the fat man from the bullpen, Paul Konerko’s grand slam, Scott Podsednik finding his power stroke twice in the postseason after not hitting a single homerun during the regular season, Geoff Blum coming off of the bench to hit a game-winning RBI after 14 innings, El Duque punching out three straight batters with the bases loaded against the Red Sox, the White Sox starting rotation pitching four straight complete games in the ALCS, A.J. Pierzynksi’s decision to run to first with a phantom ball in the dirt, and Bobby Jenks routinely making that annoying “fire” graphic come up on the Fox radar gun to close the games out made last October one of those months that I’ll be telling my kids about years from now. As for today, though, there’s always next year.

New Features on Frank the Tank’s Slant and Land-o-Links for 10/23/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago Cubs, College Football, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, Random Thoughts, Sports2 Comments

There are a few new features on the sidebar, including The Slant Poll of the Week that aims to capture the pulse of the winners of society that read this blog and lists of Recent Posts and the Top Posts of the Day. Later this week, I’ll step away from the world of sports and news to recap my 10-year high school reunion. (Hooray HF!) Until then, here are some links:

1) Give Me Back the Old Iron Mike, The Wordsmith (Chi-Sox Blog) – A heartfelt call for the return of the preeminent public speaker of our time. For those that need a reminder of the brilliance of Mike Tyson, here’s his magnum opus.

2) Fantasy Sports? Child’s Play. Here, Politics Is The Game (New York Times) – I enjoy discussing politics more than most people, but I’ve got to draw the line here.

3) Obama vs. Clinton – A Primary Fight for the Ages? (Washington Post) – Speaking of politics, people are going a little overboard with Barack Obama merely mentioning that he’s thought about running for President. I’ve said before that 2008 would be a great time for him to run, but it’s not as if though yesterday’s Meet the Press interview was some grand revelation that has justified being the lead story of virtually every newscast and newspaper in the country.

4) Dartmouth – Holy Cross Football “Brawl” (YouTube) – Forget about that Miami-FIU fight. This is what happens when the dregs of society don’t get into Harvard or Yale.

5) Egg Salad Is Latest Food To Be Found Contaminated (Chicagoist) – This is why your diet should consist of only frozen pizza, bacon, and Twinkies.

6) MILF Weed (YouTube) – I don’t have Showtime so I haven’t gotten into “Weeds” yet, but this is a great clip with my main man Snoop Dogg.

And finally…

7) The Cubs Casket (Goat Riders of the Apocalypse) – The Cubs finally killed him. Thank goodness that I’m a White Sox fan.

Drunk Off Bears Kool-Aid and Illini Juice (Plus Other Random Thoughts)

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago White Sox, College Football, Illinois Fighting Illini, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, Sports2 Comments

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Alright, I’m excited now. The Bears just mauled the defending NFC Champion Seattle Seahawks on all facets of the game. Rex Grossman is leading a balanced offensive attack brilliantly (with Bernard Berrian turning into a Willie Gault-esque deep threat), while Tommie Harris is blossoming into a star on defense. With the Bears’ next four opponents having only a combined four wins total so far, we’re in excellent shape. I’d still like to have a little more confidence in the running game in the first half, which is going to become more important as the weather starts turning colder, but considering this is pretty much the first time Chicago has had a legitimate passing threat at the quarterback position since the days of Erik Kramer, I’m ecstatic about the offense overall. The most difficult thing for me now is to avoid getting too wrapped up in the Super Bowl Shuffle Redux hype that’s going to blanket the city for the next few months (let’s hope Ricky Manning Jr.’s community service doesn’t include a suspension from the NFL). However, I’ve definitely put the Bears Kool-Aid on ice.

Some other random thoughts:

1) Juice Digs John L. Smith’s Grave – The Bears and Illini winning in the same weekend?! Next thing you know, Screech Powers is going to star in a porno video. Not only did Illinois ruin Michigan State’s homecoming by securing an upset as 25 1/2 point underdogs, but the Illini did it in clutch fashion with Juice Williams leading a charge downfield in with less than three minutes to go in the game to set up the game-winning field goal by Jason Reda. Obviously, there are going to be a lot more growing pains with a freshman quarterback being thrust into Big Ten play, but seeing the potential of what Juice can do is making the future of our program appear a whole lot more positive. (What was up with our team trying to plant a flag on the field after the game, though? That was completely unnecessary and Ron Zook rightly apologized in his postgame press conference.) Needless to say, after the Spartans’ debacles against Notre Dame and Illinois in consecutive weeks, firejohnlsmith.net is extremely fired up. With the next two games on the Illinois schedule being at home against Indiana and Ohio (as opposed to Ohio State), this season could end up looking a whole lot better than what we expected just a week ago.

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2) College Football Potpourri – If all goes according to plan, the Michigan-Ohio State game is going to determine who gets into the national championship game as opposed to “just” a Rose Bowl bid… Troy Smith rules. I still don’t know how the national media got so wrapped up in the Brady Quinn bukkake in the preseason that Smith wasn’t the Heisman Trophy favorite from the get-go. Now they know… After a spanking by Notre Dame (and Darius Walker in particular), Purdue’s defense might very well prove to be the worst in the Big Ten. If the Illini want to make a glorious comeback to vindicate my greenie-induced preseason prediction of the team making a bowl, it’s going to hinge on the Purdue game on November 11th.

3) NFL Football Potpourri – How is it that my one fantasy team that lost Shaun Alexander to the Madden Jinx is taking no prisoners with a perfect record so far, while my other fantasy team with Drew Brees, Edgerrin James, and other solid players is winless? I’ve never had such a dichotomy between my two franchises… When Peyton Manning does what he did against the Jets on Sunday in the playoffs against a top-tier defense, then I’ll take notice of the Colts. Until then, they’re always going to be suspect… As much as the nation might be going through a Terrell Owens hype overload, I’ll admit that I’m extremely excited for T.O.’s return to Philadelphia next week. As someone that has spent more time in Philly than any place other than Chicago since I have so much family that lives there, I’m forecasting a downpour of pill bottles raining onto the Cowboys’ sideline on Sunday. I love Philly fans!

4) Baseball Hangover and Postseason Predictions – You know that feeling where your team has been competitive all year but there’s a sudden point where it’s all over for that team and you lose sight of the fact that the season is still going on? While this happens to Cubs fans every year around the middle of June, the White Sox kept my full attention up until about two weeks ago. Since that time, I’ve been in such a baseball funk that I didn’t realize that the Tigers had blown the AL Central on the last day of the season until last night. The best comparison that I can think of are of the times immediately following Illinois getting eliminated in the NCAA Tournament – I kind of have a hangover for a bit where it’s tough for me to get into the other games. I’ve just about gotten over the malaise where I can watch the baseball playoffs with interest again, so here are my predictions (which you should immediately bet against):

a) AL Division Series: Twins over A’s in 5 (even without Francisco Liriano, Minnesota has the best pitching staff out of the postseason participants and the team has simply been playing out of its mind), Yankees over Tigers in 4 (Detroit has been wheezing for the last couple of months)

b) NL Division Series: Dodgers over Mets in 5 (I’ve been saying all along that the Mets are overrated and with Pedro Martinez being out, they’re bowing out in the first round), Cardinals over Padres (just a gut feeling even though St. Louis has looked awful lately)

c) AL Championship Series – Twins over Yankees in 6 (You can talk about you want about the Yankees’ reincarnation of Murderers’ Row at the plate, but their number one starter is Chien-Ming Wang. Even as a fellow Asian, a 19-game winner with only 76 strikeouts in 218 innings pitched is fool’s gold.)

d) NL Championship Series – Dodgers over Cardinals in 7 (Should turn out to be a great series. There’s some type of magic with L.A. this season.)

e) World Series – Twins over Dodgers in 6 (It doesn’t matter which AL you put into this slot. Whoever comes out of the Junior Circuit side of the bracket is going to smoke the NL champs.)

And finally…

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5) Bull Market Around the Corner – It’s hard to believe, but Bulls training camp has already opened with Ben Wallace at the helm. I just secured tickets to the first meeting of the year between the Bulls and Pistons, so I’m one of the handful of people on Earth ready to get the NBA season started. Let’s just hope our Big Ben sinks just a few more free throws this season.

(Images from Chicago Tribune, Chicago Tribune, and Chicago Tribune again)

Random Predictions and Land-o-Links for 9/22/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago White Sox, College Football, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NFL Football, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

Predictions for the day: Bears over the Vikings on Sunday, Iowa continues my Illinois misery, Michigan State over Notre Dame in a close one, Alex will hook up with Dr. Addison Shepherd on Grey’s Anatomy within the next few episodes (I’ve been convinced of this since the middle of last season), and an angry Tiger Woods will avenge his wife’s honor to lead the U.S. to victory in the Ryder Cup. On to today’s links…

1) The Links of Death (Fleece the Pig, Flog the Pony) – A comprehensive around-the-web roundup on the death of the Chicago White Sox, including a reference to yours truly.

2) Star Wars Lego Orchestra (Linda) – An animated Stormtrooper Lego orchestra performs the Imperial March with Darth Vader as the conductor. ‘Nuff said.

3) ‘Spaceballs’ to Become TV Cartoon (CNN.com) (from Kenny) – Tangentially, I’m really hoping that Pizza the Hut is going to be resurrected.

4) Tribune to Consider Sale of Some Media Assets (New York Times) – For the Cubs fans out there that have been craving for new ownership, it might be around the corner.

5) My Dreams Aren’t All Wet (Chronically Insane) – Despite the classy title of this post, this all has to do with the popularity of soccer in the United States. Meanwhile, the Wall Street Journal reported today that Zidane’s World Cup head butt has made him a bigger endorsement commodity than ever.

6) Chief Update Plus the QB Decision (Illinitalk) – I completely agree that it’s time for the Illini to free the Juice.

7) Oh, I’ve Had Those Days (Minneapolis Red Sox) – Heh…

And finally…

8) Toasting Benefits of Social Drinking (Los Angeles Times) – A scientific study shows that drinkers make more money than non-drinkers. Taking into account all of my previous “studying” in college and law school, I should soon be a billionaire.

Have a great weekend and HOORAY BEARS!

You Can’t Spell NBC Without Howie Mandel and Land-o-Links for 9/19/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago White Sox, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

I’m positive that the contestants on Deal or No Deal are culled from the people that failed the Wheel of Fortune pretests. There also should be a VIP lounge in hell strictly for the “friends and family” that continue to shout “No Deal!” when the contestant, who almost always has some type of huge debt due to medical problems/school loans/lost job/etc., could end up with a six-figure check if he or she would just walk away but invariably opens up one case too many. Anyway, some random links for your Tuesday:

1) Requiem for a Season (Ron Karkovice Fan Club) – This was written even before Magglio Ordonez slammed the White Sox last night to put us on life support. It turns out that Mags and Big Frank Thomas were out for blood money the past few days. Let’s move on before I go postal on something somewhere…

2) Time to Move the Mississippi, Experts Say (New York Times) – Engineers are examining ways to divert the Mississippi River to spill out into the Gulf Coast farther north. Next, after going through the process on how the Chicago River is turned green on St. Patrick’s Day, they’ll tackle the age-old problem of trying to make it look blue for the rest of the year. (Thank you, I’ll be here all week.)

3) No-Show Kemp Blows Chance With Bulls (Chicago Tribune) – In 2016, the first 30 picks of the NBA Draft will all be children of Shawn Kemp.

4) Hip-Hop Lovers in Britain Have More Sex According to Survey (AllHipHop.com) – If you need any more proof that country music sucks, I don’t know what to tell you.

5) Rose’s Decision to Sign Confession Balls… Brilliant (ESPN.com) – The scumbag makes the news again with another money-making scheme. One argument that I hear a lot that I can’t stand: if Pete Rose confesses to gambling on baseball, he ought to be forgiven and let into the Hall of Fame. This doesn’t make sense whatsoever. If gambling is the “death penalty” offense for baseball, confessing to committing the offense is essentially proof of such offense, which thereby means that baseball has no choice but to apply the corresponding penalty. The “Rose didn’t use steroids like Bonds, McGwire, or Sosa” argument doesn’t do anything for me, either. The number one reason why I love watching sports is that, unlike the majority of television shows, movies, and other forms of entertainment, the outcome of every game is unpredictable and not predetermined. When people with influence can alter such outcome as a result of gambling, Major League Baseball becomes nothing more than a WWE match with bats and balls. Nothing is worse for sports than the prospect of its players, managers, and coaches gambling on their own games and, therefore, Pete Rose should never even get a sniff of Cooperstown.

And finally…

6) Evolution of Dance (YouTube) – Somehow, this clip is the most-watched video of all-time on YouTube (and it’s not even close – it has twice as many views as the #2 video). The average outtake from The Simpsons or Seinfeld blows thie clip away in terms of overall comedic value, but I do have to make the recommendation to watch this only because the comedian here uses a number of patented Frank the Tank dance moves when U Can’t Touch This starts playing about halfway through. You’ll see what I’m talking about.

Regardless of everything else going on in the world, one thing continues to hold true: Hooray Bears!

All is Right With the World: Bears Smack the Pack

On By Frank the TankIn Big East, Big Ten, Chicago White Sox, College Football, Illinois Fighting Illini, Major League Baseball, NFL Football, Sports3 Comments

Illinois has severely cramped its chances to make it to the Motor City Bowl this year with a craptacular 33-0 drubbing at Rutgers (Rutgers?!) and Ron Zook is talking about employing more of the “rugby punt” as a “secret weapon” (I wish that was a joke). The White Sox pitching staff continues to get shelled in the late innings of ballgames while messing up a golden opportunity to gain some ground with the Twins and Tigers beating up on each other.

So why is it that I woke up this morning feeling more than satisifed with my sports weekend? Well, the Bears completely maimed the Packers, that’s why. After more than a decade of Brett Favre slicing up the Bears defense with his gunslinger mentality, father time has finally caught up to him and Green Bay is paying the price. The Bears defense throttled him so much that he suffered the first shutout in his career.

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What I was really happy about, however, was that for the first time since probably the Erik Kramer “era”, the Bears put together a complete game on both the offensive and defensive sides of the ball. Rex Grossman was sharp and accurate, Mushin Muhammad caught more difficult passes in this game than all of last season, the offense figured out that the tight end and fullback can actually be incorporated into the game plan as opposed to being statues, the running game was solid, the Bernard Berrian touchdown play puts NFL defenses on notice that they can’t stack 11 guys in the box against the Bears anymore, the defensive line ran ramshod over the Green Bay offensive front, the secondary blanketed everyone outside of Favre’s crutch in Donald Driver, Devin Hester has shown that he’s electrifying on special teams (after I ripped on the Bears’ draft this past April, I have to give a ton of credit to Jerry Angelo for that pick), and our kicking and punting games were flawless.

There are a couple of things that the Bears need to improve upon, particularly converting touchdowns in the red zone. However, it’s a huge turning point in that we can go into Lambeau Field again with a sense of confidence and the Favre bogey man has been fully eradicated. The Bears just beat their biggest and most hated rival on the road on opening day with a 26-0 shutout. Life doesn’t get much better than that.

(Image from Chicago Tribune)