Category: Land-o-Links

“That’s All Things Considered’s Music!!!” and Land-o-Links for 8/18/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago White Sox, College Basketball, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

During my ten-minute drive from my house to the train station every morning, I usually listen to National Public Radio. This is because: (a) the music stations seem to think that people only want to hear 45-minute discussions about the latest celebrity engagement/marriage/divorce during the morning drive as opposed to, say, listening to music; (b) the sports stations have about a 2-to-1 commercial-to-program ratio in the morning; and (c) I like my news coverage to be more than reciting the latest Yahoo! News headlines.

So, since I only spend a few minutes in the car each day, NPR is perfect for that time. I know that I’m going to get a couple of in-depth news stories that I wouldn’t have found on my own. (By the way, do you know how you have that stomach turning moment in life where you realize that you have turned into your parents? For me, it was when I started to willingly listen to NPR. I used to complain to my father all of the time in the car when he listened to NPR instead of the mysogynist hip-hop music that I favored. Now look at what’s happened to me – I own a house in the suburbs and listen to NPR while driving a minivan. Once I start complaining about any hoodlums in neighborhood that keep partying with the bass too loud, my transformation will be complete.)

At the same time, I’m not going to be deluged with a bunch of commercials in the traditional sense. NPR does have sponsors for segments, which are usually refined entities that fit the tone and tenor of the station such as financial services companies, corporate law firms, museums, and fine arts festivals.

Considering all of this, I nearly urinated on myself in the car the other day when the NPR announcer non-chalantly stated, “Your Chicago Public Radio traffic and weather report has been brought to you by the WWE SummerSlam.” My goodness, the Hulkster is body slamming the Hezbollah!!! Who’s ready for the Garrison Keillor/Carl Kasell tag team??? The only thing that could have been funnier is if the announcer had capped it by informing the listeners that they could watch everything live this Sunday at the Rosemont Horizon. Vince McMahon must have sent in one helluva check during the spring pledge drive. Anyway, here are the links for the weekend:

1) Slippery When Airborne (Malay Mail) (from Danny M) – YES, THOSE SNAKES DESERVED TO DIE, AND I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL!!!

2) 2006-07 Illinois Men’s Basketball Schedule (FightingIllini.com) – The nonconference schedule is definitely a step down from the last five or six seasons, although that’s appropriate since this is probably going to be a weaker transition year before the Illini ramp it up again for the monster freshman class starting in 2007-08 (assuming Indiana stops doing the devil’s work in trying to steal our recruit). I’m definitely looking forward to the Arizona game on December 2nd, which will be our first meeting with the Wildcats since the greatest sports event I have ever seen and probably ever will see. If for some reason you need a reminder of what occurred on March 26, 2005, bestill the power of YouTube here.

derons-shot.jpg

(Random Note #1: A couple of my buddies were playing pickup hoops in downtown Chicago last weekend when out of the blue, Dee Brown showed up along with an entourage of 5 other guys and joined the game. Quoting one of the players regarding Dee: “He broke my ankles, drained threes in my face, and trash talked…it was awesome. In one game, we were on the same team and he caught me on a backdoor move. The play was so smooth…it’s like we’ve been playing together for years.” That might be the most awesome story I have ever heard in my life.)

(Random Note #2: The picture above of Deron Williams posterizing Channing Frye has been the wallpaper on my computer since March 27, 2005. Just so you know.)

3) 5 Predictions for the Big Ten (ESPN.com) – Switching to football, I’ll gladly take “long-term optimism” and run with it.

4) The Barkers Meet MySpace (E! Online News) – Well, this is certainly one way to get your side of the story out to the public.

5) The Buerhle Bile File: Making History: Game 120 Thoughts (Chi-Sox Blog) – After what was supposed to be a break in the schedule against the Royals (the White Sox ended up barely splitting the 4-game series against the worst team in baseball), the Sox now have 10 straight games with the Twins and Tigers. I was really hoping that I could enjoy the next 6 weeks without having the worry about the Sox making the playoffs, but no dice here.

6) Snakes on Claire Danes (YouTube) – Heh-heh…

And finally…

7) Australians Upset Over Loud Manilow Music (San Francisco Chronicle) – Sometimes, you’re better off just putting up with those punk kids because the solution is ten times worse.

(Image from FightingIllini.com)

Land-o-Links – 8/14/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago White Sox, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NFL Football, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

A few links to get your week started off right:

1) Disconnected in Suburbia – After being banned from the interweb by the FCC for a few weeks, Chronically Insane is back and we’re all better for it.

2) Fat Factors (New York Times) – This is a lengthy article, but it goes over fascinating studies scientists are performing to examine factors outside of genes and eating/exercise habits that could cause obesity (including viruses).

3) Try As They Might, Bears Can’t Quell QB Derby (Chicago Tribune) – I forgot to mention another reason as to why preseason football is excruciating: the inevitable infatuation Bears fans develop with the backup quarterback after the first preseason game. This puppy love will continue until that backup quarterback actually has to play or the last game of the season, whichever comes first.

4) You Hearin’ Those Footsteps? (South Side Sox) – I’m feeling a little bit better today about the playoff hopes for the White Sox, but there’s still a ton of work to be done.

5) Stephen A. Smith Heckled at the 2006 NBA Draft, Second Round (YouTube) (from Minneapolis Red Sox) – QUITE FRANKLY, I NEED MY CHEESE DOODLES!!!

6) VH-1 Flavor of Love Blog – Unofficial takes on the best show on television.

And finally…

7) Kanye West to Tour With Rolling Stones and U2 (AllHipHop.com) – I got jipped with the opening act when I went to see the Stones back in January. Wow!!!

Preseason Blues and Land-o-Links for 8/5/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago Bears, College Football, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, NFL Football, Random Thoughts, Sports5 Comments

I love football. It doesn’t matter whether it’s pro football or college football – I’ll watch it all. I run multiple fantasy football teams every year. There have to be monstrous extraneous factors for me to miss watching a Bears or Illini game. However, for all of this love for the pigskin, there’s one thing that doesn’t excite me at all: preseason football.

Even though my heart flutters a little bit when NFL training camps open, preseason football just doesn’t do it for me. Don’t get me wrong – I’ll most likely end up watching the Hall of Fame Game this weekend along with all of the Bears preseason games (not to mention that a number of professional gamblers believe that the preseason presents great betting opportunities). Yet, as opposed to whetting my appetite for the upcoming regular season, which is what spring training does for me with baseball, the NFL preseason is an excruciatingly long month that puts me on edge.

The reason is that the NFL preseason has absolutely no correlation with what occurs during the regular season. (Random Factoid for Use in a Bar Bet – Question: What was the Bears’ preseason record before their 15-1 Super Bowl season in 1985? Answer: 1 win, 3 losses.) While the third game of the preseason is usually when teams leave their starters in for the most amount of time, the ultimate goal for most head coaches is to make sure they don’t have too many injuries going into the season opener. That means the average preseason game might see the starting units on the field for the first quarter, at most (I doubt we’ll see Rex Grossman take snaps for more than a series or two per game). After that, it’s a cacophony of scrubs trying to grab a third-string spot or a place on the practice squad. That’s not real football. At least in spring training baseball games, there is a feeling that the game of baseball is actually being played with the players that are going to be out there everyday.

There is nothing better in sports than a football game where both teams are playing at the highest level. However, preseason football is a bastardized version of this great sport. That being said, I’ll still watch it, though. On to today’s links:

1) Best Sports Cities 2006: Welcome Back, Chicago (Sporting News) – It’s no contest.

2) Zook’s Latest Coup Gives Hope (Mark Tupper Weblog) – How many “risks” are going to be acceptable for Ron Zook to take in order to get the Illini football program back on the map? Illinois just enrolled Melvin Alaeze, who was the number one rated defensive end in the nation out of the high school Class of 2005 but had his scholarship to Maryland rescinded because he (a) failed to qualify academically (which concerns me since Illinois is considerably more difficult to get into than Maryland) and (b) has some problems with the reefer. Of course, something tells me that if he really is the faster and stronger version of Simeon Rice that the scouts claim and Illinois turns into a perennial bowl game participant that we believe it should be, we’re going to end up forgetting these details within the next couple years. It’s somewhat sad, but it’s true everywhere in big-time college athletics.

3) Wee, Wee, Wee – Half the Way Home (Siberia, Minnesota) – Some of my Illini brethren have been foiled again. It’s probably a good thing that Facebook didn’t exist when I was in college (and an extremely good thing for Minneapolis Red Sox).

4) Whoa, Wait – You Meant That? (Chicagoist) – This is what happens when the Chicago City Council fails high school economics.

5) Bears Need Offense to Help Defense (ESPN.com) – The Bears training camp report filed by John Clayton AKA Bill Gates’ Dorkier Little Brother. Interesting tidbit: only one Bears team over the past 10 seasons has averaged more than 21 points a game, which was the 2001 club that averaged a huge 21.1. Bleh!

6) Top Ten Will Farrell SNL Skits of All Time (TK) – For anyone that has ever wondered, I seriously have had the nickname of Frank the Tank since my tenure at Brookwood Junior High at the beginning of the 1990s, which was long before Will Farrell’s character of the same name ever appeared in Old School.

frank_the_tank.jpg
And finally…

7) Write Your Very Own Sports Guy Column (The Chicago Sports Review) (from Deadspin) – Bill Simmons AKA The Sports Guy on ESPN’s Page 2 is one of my favorite columnists on any subject, whether it’s inside or outside of the sports arena. Over time, he has developed a distinct writing style which has influenced plenty of writers out there (including myself), where a column on a sports topic is heavily interspersed with reality TV show and ’80s pop culture references. In fact, Simmons’ writing style has become so pervasive that it was only a matter of time that someone put up a “Mad Libs”-style form to create your own Sports Guy column. You can take a look at my end product, which is on the next page, but you really need to try it out yourself first before reading anyone else’s versions in order to get the full effect.

(UPDATE: The real Sports Guy has new mailbag column today, where he provides an apt description of the cab line at the Las Vegas airport.)

Continue reading “Preseason Blues and Land-o-Links for 8/5/2006” →

Yankee Doodle Dealings and Land-o-Links for 8/2/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago Bulls, College Football, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

Pitching and defense win championships in baseball. It’s a concept that’s constantly beaten into our heads, right? Yet, almost every baseball prognosticator alive is convinced that the Yankees have taken control of the American League by adding Bobby Abreu and Craig Wilson to the lineup along with fifth starter Cory Lidle. (Mercifully, the great Gregg Doyel is an exception.)

Now, considering that the Yankees were able to obtain these players for very little in exchange, these were certainly great deals when examining them on paper. However, even with the injuries to Hideki Matsui and Gary Sheffield, the Yankees weren’t having any trouble scoring runs before the trade deadline. Their biggest concern, as with many other teams, was and still is starting pitching. Lidle’s stats need to be taken with a monster grain of salt since he’s coming from the National League. If Bronson Arroyo all of the sudden becomes an ace by switching leagues, you know that there’s a serious gap in quality.

The upshot here is that the Yankees could very well bash in enough runs to make it to the postseason, but there’s no way that they’re winning the World Series this year with that pitching staff. For all of those that get a little too excited about sexy offensive stats, remember how the Indianpolis Colts and the Dallas Mavericks ended their respective seasons in 2006. The adage about pitching and defense winning championships is old and tired, but it bears repeating since people seem to forget it every single year. On to today’s links:

1) Parsing Mel’s Meltdown (Washington Post) – Let’s see… Steven Spielberg… Jeffrey Katzenberg… the Weinstein brothers… it seems to me that Hollywood isn’t the greatest town in the world to have a beef with Jewish people. (By the way, I hope I will look half as good as this if I ever have to get a mugshot taken in a drunken stupor.)

2) Bulls Announce 2006-07 Regular Season (Bulls.com) – Call me crazy, but the last time that I’ve been this excited about an upcoming season for any of my rooting interests was with the 2004-05 Illini basketball team. There’s nothing quite like watching a team on the ascent after improving significantly during the offseason. The coverage of the Bulls is getting back up to the numbers of the Jordan Era, with 30 of their games being broadcast on national television (which doesn’t even include the games on Superstation WGN). If anything, it could be a banner October with the Bulls (tipping off on Halloween), White Sox (as long as our pitchers stop giving up run totals in the double-digits), Bears, and better-than-even odds for a Big Ten win for Illinois football since we have Indiana at home this year.

3) Defending Conference Co-Champion Ohio State Named Big Ten Football Preseason Favorite (Big Ten.com) – In case you missed the blanket ESPNEWS coverage of Big Ten Media Day yesterday, the media members voted for the obvious preseason choice for conference football champs. With these high gridiron expectations being coupled with one of the greatest basketball recruiting classes in history coming into Columbus this year, it’s a great time to be a Buckeye. As for the Illini, did I mention the fact that Illinois gets to play Indiana at home this year?

4) Move Over, Napa (Chicago Tribune) – My wife and I were up in the Saugatuck-Douglas area over the Fourth of July weekend, and I’ll have to say that I’m a fan of the Michigan vino.

And finally…

5) Man Has Erection For 10 Years and Wins $400k in Lawsuit (San Francisco Chronicle) – Chuck Norris doesn’t understand why you should consult your doctor if your erection lasts more than four hours. As seen in this article, his erections have been known to last up to ten years.

(UPDATE: Deadspin is reporting that the Latino sensation Miller Park Chorizo, which began racing last week, won’t be back until next season because Major League Baseball needs to “vet all new mascots.”  This finally answers my question as to what Bud Selig does all day.)

Land-o-Links – 7/25/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago White Sox, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, NFL Football, Politics, Random Thoughts, Sports4 Comments

About a week-and-a-half ago on a Saturday, a small fire occurred in the building next door to my company’s offices in the Loop. On the following Monday, every store and restaurant on the floor where the fire occurred, which includes Bank of America, Dunkin’ Donuts, Nestle Toll House Cookies, and Gateway Newsstands, was closed with the glaring exception of one right in the middle of it all: Starbucks. God forbid that the zombie-like addicts don’t get their caffeine crack during the Monday rush-hour. The point here is that whatever you think of Starbucks, they obviously have such a well-tuned disaster plan that they ought to be put in charge of running FEMA. Anyway, on to today’s links:

1) Welcome, All Chorizos! (Deadspin) – Usually, “South of the Border” to people from Wisconsin means FIBs.

2) 2008: The Case for Barack Obama (Washington Post) – If I were Barack, I’d be running for President right away. Out of the 5 Presidents that we’ve elected over the past 30 years, the only one that had any substantive national experience was George H.W. Bush. If anything, the more time that you spend in the U.S. Senate, the worse presidential candidate you become (see John Kerry, Al Gore, and Bob Dole).

3) White Sox Acquire MacDougal (South Side Sox) – For all of the Alfonso Soriano rumors, acquiring Mike MacDougal from the Royals to shore up a less-than-stellar bullpen was the move that the White Sox really needed to make before the trade deadline. Even South Side player-hater Minneapolis Red Sox approved of the move! Of course, it would help if we started winning again.

4) Chicago Bulls’ New ‘Bench Seat’ Runs $125,500 Per Season (Crain’s Chicago Business) – While this might sound expensive, the cost of this seat for an entire year is almost $60,000 less than what Ben Wallace will be making per game from the Bulls during the life of his new contract. From that standpoint, this is a steal, right?

5) Camp Starts Thursday (Da’ Bears Blog) – I don’t know about you, but Bears training camp, which opens up tomorrow, has completely snuck up on me.  This is noteworthy because I usually start counting down the days to the opening of training camp by around the Fourth of July, particularly when the Bears are coming off of a playoff run as they are this year.  However, with everything that has been going on with the Sox and Bulls over the summer plus an even worse than average season for the Cubs, we’re in a rare period where the Bears aren’t dominating the Chicago sports scene.  That being said, I’m starting to get the annual football itch.

And finally…

6) New Monopoly Version Uses Debit Card (Yahoo! News) – No word on whether we need to pay $1.50 for each time that we pass “Go”.

Land-o-Links – 7/21/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, Random Thoughts, Soccer, Sports1 Comment

I’m not happy with the performance of the White Sox lately at all. If this keeps up, we might be worrying a lot more about the AL wild card contenders behind us right now than Detroit. Well, at least there are some links to take away attention from the slumping Sox:

1) Making Money in Basketball (Blog Maverick) – Mark Cuban’s suggestion on how to build a successful minor league basketball franchise: pay off high school kids… seriously. While his “business plan” here starts with this unfathomable leap, he does make an excellent point as to how European basketball teams make their serious profits from the buyout clauses of the players that they develop that go on to the NBA and that there’s no reason that an American minor league club couldn’t do the same. The Wall Street Journal had an article a couple of weeks ago about how the reverse of this money flow occurs in the soccer world, where European soccer clubs will pay large “transfer rights” to Latin American clubs for the top players that they develop, which are completely separate from the actual playing contracts for those players (it’s a virtual stock market regarding the value of soccer players, which is why the Journal reported that hedge funds have been getting into the action). In the case of superstar Cristiano Ronaldo, Manchester United paid his old club in Portugal $19.2 million for his transfer rights. Something tells me that the Pistons paid a bit less for the rights to Darko Milicic (although I could be very wrong in that thought).

2) Scientists Plan to Rebuild Neanderthal Genome (New York Times) – They’re exclusively using DNA samples from Patrick Ewing and Bill Laimbeer.

3) Ex-Village People Singer Answers Charges (Los Angeles Times) – You knew it had to be the cop, right? By the way, it might be just me, but I always have an internal chuckle at every wedding that I attend where all of the grandmothers are whooping it up to “YMCA” since it’s obvious that they have absolutely no clue what that song is about.

4) Remini Held Suri Cruise During L.A. Visit (Washington Post) – There still hasn’t been any denial that this baby is an alien cyborg. Hmmmm….

5) Quite Frankly, Baker Bails Out (Chicago Tribune) – A number of Cubs bloggers received emails that appeared to come from the producers of Stephen A. Smith’s show on ESPN, urging them to join the studio audience during a Dusty Baker interview and boo him. Smith stated that he believed it was a hoax and then blamed Deadspin for all of this. Of course, Deadspin has a nice retort to Stephen A’s accusations.

And finally…

6) Pennsylvania Man, 80, Admits Dealing Crack for Sex (San Francisco Chronicle) – On that note, have a great weekend!

Land-o-Links – 7/12/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago White Sox, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

It wasn’t exactly an exciting All-Star Game up until there were 2 outs in the 9th inning last night, but it was nice to see the American League clinch home-field advantage for their pennant winner, who will hopefully be the White Sox. By the way, I really can’t stand the fact that Bud Selig decided to use an exhibition game to determine home-field advantage for the game’s championship as opposed to using the individual records of the teams involved like every other sport. However, I’ve got to admit I was on edge when Michael Young had 2 strikes on him in the top of the 9th as well as when Mariano Rivera was closing it out at the bottom – this really did have true implications for AL manager Ozzie Guillen and my White Sox in the future. It was artificially created and completely unfair drama, but it was drama nonetheless. Anyway, here are today’s links:

1) New Gender Divide: At Colleges, Women Are Leaving Men in the Dust (New York Times) – Case study used: a comparison of the performances of Frank the Tank and his wife at the University of Illinois.

2) In Tijuana, the Real ‘Nacho Libre’ (Washington Post) – The happiest place on Earth!

3) Shock and Gone (Chicago Tribune) – I have never listened to Mancow with any regularity, but I do remember back in high school when he announced one morning that he was going to pay for all of the customers at a Homewood gas station around the corner from my childhood home, which caused the worse traffic jam that has ever been seen in the South Suburbs (and with the perpetual construction surrounding the I-80/I-294 interchange heading into Indiana, AKA “The I-PASS Lane to the Gates of Hell”, that’s saying something).

4) Sports Bars May Be Left With Shania, ‘Simpsons’ (Chicago Sun-Times) – It’s the day after the All-Star Game, which means it’s also the worst day of the year for sports fans.

And finally…

5) Awkward Moments Abound in Penis Pump Trial (San Francisco Chronicle) – Our nation’s justice system at work.

Fine Explosions in Naperville and Land-o-Links for 7/5/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago White Sox, College Basketball, Illinois Fighting Illini, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, Random Thoughts, Sports3 Comments

When my wife and I decided to buy a house in Naperville and leave our apartment in Roscoe Village on the North Side of Chicago a couple of years ago, most of my friends thought it was more sane for us to move to a space station using a shuttle that had pieces of foam falling off of it. The majority of the comments were along the lines of, “You’re moving to Yuppie-ville?” and “Enjoy the beige houses.” Of course, these friends at the time were all (a) not married and (b) looking at things from the perspective of renting for the next year as opposed to emptying out a bank account to buy a place to prospectively raise a family for the next ten to twenty years.

Granted, there are plenty of things that I miss about living in the city. In particular, I loved our neighborhood of Roscoe Village, which was lined with classic Chicago brownstones and close enough to Wrigleyville to walk to Clark and Addison within twnety minutes yet far enough away that we didn’t have idiot Cubs fans pissing on our lawn after games. (As a Sox fan that lived that close to Wrigley Field during the all-consuming Cubs playoff run in 2003, I have little patience for Cubs fans claiming that South Siders have been too obnoxious since we won last year. The only thing worse than being a White Sox fan living on the North Side during that time in ’03 was being a Red Sox fan stuck in the Bronx at that same time.) There’s no place in the world that I love more than Chicago and I still get a small adrenaline rush when my commuter train pulls into view of the city’s skyline every morning.

That being said, moving to Naperville was a terrific decision. Forget about the stellar public schools or the accolades that it is the best place to live in the nation. Here’s what it all comes down to, which I learned about last night: Best. Fireworks. Ever.

They were so good that I actually felt compelled enough to dedicate an entire post to such an inane subject. Let me note that I’m not throwing these positive proclamations around very lightly. My parents to this day are certified fireworks fanatics, which means that I spent my Fourth of July weekends as a child hitting the South Suburban fireworks trifecta of shows in Hazel Crest, Chicago Heights, and our hometown of Glenwood on consecutive evenings. They seriously go out of their way to catch as many fireworks performances as they can not only during the Independence Day season, but for the rest of the year, as well (i.e. Chicago’s Venetian Night, the twice-weekly Navy Pier shows, etc.). At the same time, I’ve been fortunate enough to witness fireworks displays in Chicago’s Grant Park, the National Mall in Washington, D.C., on Lahaina Harbor in Maui, and at Walt Disney World in Florida (for a view on Philadelphia’s fireworks, check out my sister’s blog). (The Most Disappointing Fourth of July Fireworks Ever: Las Vegas. Last year when I was there, instead of the city having the fireworks shoot off of the rooftops of the hotels on the Strip as it had in the past, the show was shuffled off into a largely inaccessible area someplace north of the Hilton. I was upset for a moment until I realized that I was still in Vegas, which made me happy again.)

Honestly, when it comes down to pure pyrotechnics (obviously, the locale of, say, the nation’s capitol adds to the overall experience), the Naperville Ribfest fireworks beat them all. Considering the inordinate number of fireworks shows that I’ve watched, the fact that probably over half of the the fireworks there were shot off were types that I had never seen before, ranging from ones that dropped down looking like unbroken streamers falling from the sky and a number that exploded to form smiley faces. At the same time, I have never seen a fireworks display that was as perfectly synchronized to music as this one. The soundtrack wasn’t there for background filler; each song sample had its own separate types of fireworks and the explosions were timed right in line with the proper beats – simply phenomenal. If you’re in the Chicago area next year during the Fourth of July weekend, I’d highly recommend the Naperville Ribfest fireworks over the Third of July fireworks at the Taste of Chicago based purely on the overall quality of the show.

Anyway, I know a few of you are dying for my take on Ben Wallace signing with the Bulls (WOW!!!), which will be forthcoming, but I’ll also be spinning some baseball thoughts into that analysis for those that are weary of my NBA focus lately (you’ll see how). Until then, here are the links for the day:

1) Keith Richards to Be in ‘Pirates’ Movie (Washington Post) – Disney is going to save a ton of money on makeup costs with this move.

2) ‘Punch A.J.’ Campaign Under Way (whitesox.com) – I’m sure Minneapolis Red Sox is going to push for his man Francisco Liriano (and I’ll grant the argument that the Twins phenom is more deserving of an All-Star spot), but you’ve got to give credit to the White Sox marketing staff for having a great sense of humor. I can’t wait to see what the Maloof brothers are going to do to get out the vote for Ron Artest next year.

3) NBA Draft: The Illini Spin (Illini Board) – A look from John Brumbaugh about the next destinations for James Augustine and Dee Brown.

4) Lil’ Kim Leaves Prison in Style (AllHipHop.com) – This is really going to hurt her reality TV show career.

5) Benny the Bull Charged With Attacking a Police Officer (CBS Sportsline) – This is when we really need those mugshots from The Smoking Gun.

And finally…

6) Kobayashi Stands Triumphant Again (Deadspin.com) – The only time he has ever failed was against a bear in “Man vs. Beast” (a great reality show better known for then-unknown but eventual Olympic gold medalist Shawn Crawford seriously coming close to accusing the zebra that he lost to in a race of taking injections in the behind from Jose Canseco in an Oakland A’s lockeroom stall). Regardless, statues need to be erected for Kobayashi on Coney Island.

(Update:  This link couldn’t wait…

7) Hot Dog – Moo & Oink Jingle Gets Some Flavor (Chicago Tribune) – If you ever watched Soul Train back in the day on WGN with any regularity (I know I’m not the only half-Chinese/half-Polish guy out there that did), you understand that this is a travesty.) 

Land-o-Links – 6/23/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Chicago White Sox, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, Random Thoughts, SportsLeave a comment

It's been an amazing week all around.  Here are some links for the weekend:

1) Ozzie Apologizes to Every Homosexual (Jay the Joke) – Ozzie Guillen correctly apologizes for using the f-bomb and then proceeds with a 4-minute long diatribe on how Jay Mariotti is still a "piece of shit."  This is absolutely well worth listening to in its entirety.

2) Guillen, Duncan Feud Over Plunking (Chicago Tribune) – During any other week with any other manager, an order to bean the son of the pitching coach of the opposing team would be the topic #1 around here.

3) A League of Their Own (Boston Globe) – Indy Transplant and I went to the White Sox-Cardinals game last night (Sox won 1-0 with their only hit being a Jim Thome homer, which was simply magnificent) and had a discussion on how much better the American League has been compared to the National League.  Sure enough, the Red Sox came out today with simulated stats showing that the record of an American League team playing a National League schedule would improve by 10 games over the entire regular season.

What's interesting to me is that the reputations of leagues and conferences in all of the major sports have completely switched around from when I was growing up.  The National League seemed to have all of the best players in the game back in the 1980s but it now seems to be the place where, as Bill Simmons claims, old pitchers from the AL such as Pedro Martinez and Roger Clemens go to spend their twilight years since the competition is so much easier.  Meanwhile, the days where the NBA Championship was really won during the grudge matches between the Bulls, Pistons, Knicks, Cavs, and Pacers in the Eastern Conference are now gone with the Western Conference now boasting teams which don't make the playoffs that could probably be top seeds if they were in the East (notwithstanding Miami's victory this past week).  Finally, in the NFL, I grew up wondering if I would ever see the AFC win a Super Bowl (the NFC was victorious in 13 straight Super Bowls, a streak that was broken by the Broncos beating the Packers in glorious fashion in Super Bowl XXXII), which seems laughable now.  To this day, I have a knee-jerk negative reaction whenever I hear someone say how bad the NFC is, but I then pull back and have to remind myself how that person is right.

4) Knicks End Year of Disharmony (New York Times) – If he hasn't already, Greg Oden needs to hire a real estate agent in Chicago pronto.  I love you, Isiah.

And finally… 

5) Limited Action Figures of B.I.G., Public Enemy Coming This Fall (AllHipHop.com) – I can fulfill my dreams of Biggie Smalls putting the smack down on C-3PO.

Land-o-Links – 6/21/2006

On By Frank the TankIn Big Ten, Chicago White Sox, College Basketball, College Football, Land-o-Links, Major League Baseball, NBA Basketball, Random Thoughts, Sports2 Comments

What an evening! Mark Cuban got fined $250,000, Dwyane Wade lived up to the Michael Corleone analogy Shaq dropped a few months ago (where Kobe Bryant is Sonny and Penny Hardaway is Fredo), the White Sox hammered in 20 runs on the Cardinals, and Ozzie Guillen turned a new rookie into a sacrificial lamb in yet another beanball war. On top of that, there was such a plethora of fantastic news that I just had to post some more links for today:

1) Guillen Has Choice Words for Mariotti (Chicago Tribune) – How those in professional sports feel about Jay Mariotti.

2) Jay the Joke – How all of the rest of us feel about Jay Mariotti (actually, Ozzie summed it up pretty well above, but the detail on this blog is a public service to society as a whole).

3) YWML Suddenly Huge With 13-Year-Olds (Deadspin) – Frequent Deadspin readers will understand why this is such a ridiculously hilarious development. For those that need a refresher course, just consult your friendly Wikipedia.

4) Nine Lives, Still Intact (Hartford Courant) – The life of Lewis the Cat was spared by a Connecticut judge yesterday, although he'll be on house arrest for the rest of eternity. We in the legal field call this "The Martha Stewart Treatment" (celebrities get all of the breaks).

5) Big Ten Creates Another Revenue Channel (The Wizard of Odds) – All Big Ten, all the time. You had me at hello.

And finally…

6) Career Suicide (Siberia, Minnesota) – There are some things that you see and you can't unsee them.